We are in the information gathering and pondering part of this unexpected process of taking care of K. There are so many unknowns that cannot be nailed down that it’s very tough to decide what course of action to take. The toe bone that is being eroded by some nefarious agent, either bone cancer or a virulent infection, is too fragile to biopsy. Consequently, we are weighing our options without knowing the exact diagnosis. We’re talking to our veterinary experts and hoping to reach a decision soon. The odds are about 50-50% between bone cancer and a very serious infection.
K is in more pain than when she wore the cast or even than before her surgery. It’s tough for us to see but she still seems happy to soak up the small pleasures in life. She uses her soft bandage as a pillow as she snoozes.
Each morning, K and I stroll out to the meadow for some time together in the sun. We walk together, knowing each other’s habits so well that no words are needed. K meticulously examines each dirt scrape or scent on a shrub. Sometimes she leaves a reply.
After my stroll with K, some mornings I am lucky enough to have time with R on the trails. He's an entertaining and loyal mountain biking partner. His energy lifts my spirits.
When R and I pass the spot where the scent of the carcass wafts across our mountain biking trail, all the training we've done pays huge dividends. He's willing to "leave it" and come storming toward me. He looks like a flying lab sometimes!
Before heading home, I checked a couple of wildlife cameras. This cute mule deer buck had peered at one camera. Ignore the date and time on the photo - I accidentally reset everything when I briefly removed a battery.
Today, somehow, the forest calmed my wild swirl of fear and worry to some extent. For the first time since Friday, I felt some semblance of inner balance. I feel confident that we'll make the best decisions that we can for K with the available information.
For now, we'll try to find joy in each day that have together, knowing that the future is always tenuous. The uncertainties are just more obvious than usual due to the specter of bone cancer.