I feel like I am starting to emerge from the fog. I felt physically sick for most of last week after K died. Finally, today, I felt a small spark of energy. I'm sure that this process will be a roller coaster but I liked seeing the ray of hope today.
I've been spending more time with R than ever before. I adore his facial expressions as he tries to please me.
I was glad to see that this bear was seeking natural food sources rather than going to homes. She dug into the ant hill which I know is full of ants. Even when I stand 15' away from it, I end up with ants crawling all over me. Bears particularly like the ant pupae (white little eggs, containing the next generation). I don't know if this bear found any pupae or not.
As I keep trying to move forward with grace, I remind myself of K's amazing spirit throughout the onslaught of osteosarcoma. She never moped and always made the most of each day. I'm trying, with all my heart, to emulate her. K is my spirit guide.