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Friday, November 22, 2013

A ray of happiness

I have to be honest. Today was a rough day. I've been having lots of pain in my neck and shoulder since August. Nothing has helped. In fact, things have only become worse so I'll be having MRI's after Thanksgiving. For new readers, I have a degenerative spine condition, and I have two sections of my spine fused already (in my neck and in my lower back). The expectation is that I'll need more fusions in the future. However, my docs and I are doing everything possible to delay more surgery so I can maintain spinal mobility for as long as possible. I'm holding out hope that we can reduce this pain by some means other than surgery.

Chronic pain is no fun but I try my very best to find the good in each day and not to let the pain define me. I have my "go-to" activities when I need a ray of happiness. One is getting outside and another is playing with my dogs. So, today, Shyla and I played outside. I adore how hopeful and happy she is. I also love seeing how gracefully and fluidly she moves. I get vicarious joy from it.
The day was mostly gray and cold but the sun shined, ever so briefly, while we were out. I took the opportunity to take Shyla's photo next to a grand old Ponderosa Pine that I've played under with many of my dogs. My Angel K and I spent a lot of time under this tree so it's a happy place for me. I love sharing K's special places with Shyla.
Then, after its brief appearance, the sun disappeared. Ice and snow still clung to the tree twigs. The ice crystals were so delicate that they totally captivated me.
The world is overwhelmingly beautiful, even on gray days like today. Thank goodness for that.


  1. Love those ice crystals, so pretty. I have been having trouble with my neck the past few months. Same thing, degenerative disk. SUCKS! But, like you said, it can't keep you from doing what you love. I hope they can help you without surgery. Be careful.

  2. just beautiful. thank you for explaining your pain and reason for it. you had referenced pain once before, and as a new reader, i didn't know what kind/why. i do hope you can find a way to manage it for as long as you can. bless you.

  3. Seeing the beauty in the world around us manages all kinds of pain :-) Thank goodness our dogs get us out and about on those gray days.

  4. Love that last photo

    Stop on by for a visit

  5. Shyla has a very "puppylike" look in that first photo - what a doll. Hope the MRIs are helpful in determining a course of action. You ARE an inspiration - I struggle every day with my discomfort and keep trying to keep that attitude positive - not an easy thing.

  6. Unrelenting pain is so hard to live with, and your beautiful scenery, snow and mountains are surely uplifting.I hope that an alternative to further surgery will happen so soon. Ice crystals, pure magic! Greetings from Jean.

  7. I don't know how you manage to ride through the mountains with the pain & spine issues you deal with everyday. You are an inspiration. What would we do without our dogs to remind us that life is to be lived joyfully? Hope the MRI's bring you some relief.

  8. KB, we understand. And we know the effort that you put into each day to find happiness. We have known that you hurt each and every day,, and we feel like we wish there is something that can be done.
    My mama- (not the mommy) just had neck surgery and she knows about neck and shoulder and arm pain-- so we understand- and think you are amazing that you keep looking for happiness, and you do find it- and then you share it with us,
    we love you

  9. We admire you for the way you manage to deal with pain on a daily basis. Is it worse at the
    beginning of winter? When the storms start coming?

    POTP to you!

    Jo and the petz

  10. I wish we got cool snowflake formations like yours here! Those are gorgeous. No wonder Shyla looks so happy!

    I am sorry your back is giving you fits again. I'll keep my fingers crossed that surgery won't happen for a while!

  11. Sounds like the best way to deal with pain.

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & roxy

  12. The ice crystals are just beautiful but we love you in front of the magnificent pine best, Shyla!
    We are so sorry that you have to deal with so much pain, KB.

    Love ya lots♥
    Mitch and Molly

  13. You definitely live in a beautiful world and your eye is very skilled at photographing it!

    I am so sorry about your unrelenting pain. I hope you can find relief. You are amazing at how you don't let it control your life. So many people in your shoes would just curl up in a ball and never go out.

  14. i'm so sorry that you have to deal with chronic pain…i can't imagine….
    YOU have inspired me for years with your attitude of gratitude and the ability to move through your pain, and seeing the beauty in all things….
    you are an inspiration of strength and determination…

  15. I'm so sorry to hear about your battle with chronic pain! I will be praying that you will get relief.
    That you do find such joy and beauty through your gorgeous pups is an inspiration.

  16. Thinking of you, and hope you feel better.

  17. I know what you mean about vicarious pleasure in Shyla's fluidity...I so enjoy watching the amazing flexibility of PIper's spine as she moves along before me on our walks in the woods. It's so effortless and perfect, but for me, a fantasy.

  18. I am so sorry about your pain. I will continue to pray for you.

    Gorgeous photos!

    Ok, when I said on my post it was cold here - I meant in the 60's. Your cold is way more impressive! And beautiful!

  19. Hi Y'all!

    So sorry you are suffering so much pain.

    You are so good at finding and sharing the beauty of your world with us. Thank you.

    Hawk aka BrownDog

  20. Hope you are getting well!
    Beautiful country you have!

  21. So love your have a way of bringing life right into our computers to feel and so appreciate...I can almost smell the beautiful crisp frost and snow! Exceptional!


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