Photos and text copyright Romping and Rolling in the Rockies 2009-2017.

All photographs and text within this blog are copyrighted.

You may not copy or repost any photos or text without specific permission from the author of this blog. When in doubt, please ask.

Friday, November 9, 2012

A cliff

When K was diagnosed with osteosarcoma, I titled my post "Falling off a cliff" (Dec 24, 2011). This was a photo from that morning.
K on the morning of her diagnosis
Today, we got very close to the edge of the same cliff. The radiologist was very concerned about Shyla's x-rays of her left forelimb - far more concerned than our family vet was yesterday. Indeed, he was so concerned that we have an appointment at Colorado State Vet School for a bone biopsy on Monday morning. The list of possible reasons for the "lytic lesion" on her ulna are: 1) bacterial infection, 2) fungal infection, 3) bone cancer (OSA), and 4) an old hairline fracture. The old hairline fracture option is a remote possibility, at best.
Shyla's eyes are windows into a beautiful soul
After our vet and I talked through the situation, she commented that I was far more calm than she expected after all we've been through in the past year. Well, if she could have seen me, she would've known that I wasn't calm - I was barely holding myself together to make key decisions. When "bone cancer" came on the radar screen as a real possibility, my entire body started to tremble. After I hung up the phone, I tried to sip my tea but I couldn't even lift the cup to my lips because my body was shaking all over.
As I trembled, this girl began showering me in kisses.
We will somehow get through this weekend, awaiting the Monday biopsy, just like we somehow survived all the various heart-wrenching phases of K's journey. But, I finally have to ask - why is this happening again? My vet suggested that Shyla came to us because she needed someone who would help her through this - someone with enough experience with exactly this kind of problem to know how to handle it. I don't know if that's true... but we will do our very best to help Shyla.

Some of you might remember that K had a serious bone infection and toe amputation one year before her OSA diagnosis in the same limb. So, I feel like every option on the radiologist's list is a rehash of the veterinary nightmare that K had for the last 18 months of her life. But, I also remember that those 18 months were precious and filled with love. K rose above her veterinary challenges to live joyfully. I know that Shyla will too... but I hope that the challenges are minor rather than major.

I know that today is "See Beautiful" Friday. Regardless of the circumstances, Shyla is beautiful on the outside and beautiful deep in her soul. Even if my worst fears are realized (which I still believe will not happen), I have no regrets. Shyla is a true gift.
Every day, I "see beautiful" in Shyla.
I love her for her puppy enthusiasm, her trust of me, and the growing bond between us. Here's to more puppy days... where she can look as goofy as she did today when a gust of mountain wind hit us!
Please don't worry if I fall silent this weekend. I'm not sure if I'll feel like blogging or not.

59 comments:

  1. I cannot imagine how hard this is for you. Both you and Shyla are in our thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It is just cruel for you to have to have worries like this again. I will be thinking of you and Shyla over the weekend and hoping for the very best news on Monday.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hugs to you and Shyla. I'll be thinking of you both.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am at a loss for words. Please believe me when I say you are in our prayers. And know that it is more than just a "saying". It is deeply heartfelt. MOM and I are here for you, whenever and whatever you need. Take a deep breath, and rise tomorrow to a new day that is filled with hope. I have hope for Shyla and she could not be in a better place than right with you.
    Blessings,
    Goose

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh my Dog! We are sending you all the strength and rottie magic we can muster. And some hugs from me.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh my goodness...I am not going to even think that Shyla may have cancer. That just wouldn't even be fair. So, know that you all are in my thoughts and prayers...

    Take care and know that there are lots of us out here praying.
    Lucy (silent MOD Troy, Ohio)

    ReplyDelete
  7. My Vickie says her head is spining, I am not sure what she menas by that but if it means she is shocked, scared, worried, hopeful, greatful, and floating, then I am with her.
    WE are sending love, strength and wishes of happy endings.

    Love
    Bert and My vickie

    ReplyDelete
  8. I truly can't write what went through my head as I read the post...

    It just can't be...

    It won't be...

    Big Hugz for here to CO

    ReplyDelete
  9. You and your family -- all of you -- are in my thoughts more than you can possibly imagine. And I'll repeat what Goose said: Shyla could not be in a better place than right with you. All love and best wishes from SoCal --

    L

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hard to imagine what you are feeling this weekend. But you are in our thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Oh man, how can this possibly be even a possibility!!!! My heart just aches for you. You know that you and Shyla will be held deeply in my heart and in my prayers with strong hope that all will turn out fine. Mega hugs to you from me.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I can't even fathom how you're feeling. I can't believe this is happening to you. I don't know what to say. Please just know we're all here for you and for Shyla, no matter what the outcome is.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Shyla came to you for a special reason, and your love, strong heart, and belief in Shyla and her love for you and you for her, and the love,hugs, and care and support from all of us in blogland will be with you, whatever happens.Too much, too soon. I have tears. Fondest greetings, Jean.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Go silent, good blogger buddy. Your readers share your anxiety and understand your need to sort out these frightening times.

    I'm hoping against hope that everything will turn out well and all of this will be a blip of a bad memory in months to come. Know that our thoughts are with all of you.

    ReplyDelete

  15. All of us in blogland will stand with you, support you, walk with you and pray with you.
    Shyla hold a special place in my heart too.

    Linda

    ReplyDelete
  16. Dear KB, I just don't have anything that I can say about this.
    Too hard to even consider OAS again, and with greatest hope have it be something that is fixable.

    We will all be waiting with our hearts in our hands for the results on Monday. Our hopes and prayers will keep God busy over the weekend.

    Love and hugs,

    Jo

    ReplyDelete
  17. We are at a loss for words KB. We will say extra prayers for you and Shyla. Please know we are here for you. Hang in there sweet Shyla. You have a lot of romping to do.

    Hugs,
    Lily Belle, Muffin & Kim

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oh gosh. I'm sorry to read that you have to relive this pain and waiting game. We will keep our paws crossed here for both of you:)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Mom Kim here - I agree with Nancy J- Shyla came to you for a special reason. And this thought just came to me - I also believe K knew why Shyla was for you. K knew that whatever happens, you would do right by Shyla. And if you feel the need to go silent this weekend then so be it. I would hope that we all understand this need - I know I do. You all will be in my thoughts and prayers.
    Kim

    ReplyDelete
  20. I seriously never thought this was a possibility given her age. Given her age, I'm really wondering if an unknown hairline fracture could be it. I mean, we all know how crazy puppies can be. One thing is for certain, Shyla is unbelievable beautiful! Please know that we will be thinking about you all this weekend! And my e-mail box is always open! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  21. I will keep you in my prayers and hope that you can be calm. I am so sorry that you even had to hear about this again. I hope with all my hope that it all works out for the best.

    Anne and Sasha

    ReplyDelete
  22. We are with you, hoping that the challenges are minor rather than major.

    Sending you our love and best wishes,
    Riley (and his mum)

    ReplyDelete
  23. Paws crossed over here that it is just an old fracture.

    ReplyDelete
  24. My heart is heavy as I read your news. I will be thinking of you, my friend, and hoping for the best possible news.

    ReplyDelete
  25. WHAT?? OMG, I'm not going to say I'm sorry right now because we're crossing our paws that this is minor. But we'll be crossing them extra hard because there's no way this can happen more than once to any one person. Shyla's gorgeous and I'm looking forward to watching her grow and learn with you! Much love and good vibes from us at Wild Dingo. We're closer now so our healing vibes are stronger! :) Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Ann.....from...Outer Banks of NC....just a reminder KB....Be Strong.......Shyla has you....and nothing could be better than that...and we all will be praying....for her speedy recovery....Have a good week-end......."As to me,I know of nothing else but miracles"(Walt Whitman)....Hugs

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'll be thinking of you two this weekend. I'm sending my love and positive energy.
    Big Hugs

    ReplyDelete
  28. I feel sick to my stomach reading this so I can only imagine how you must feel. I'll be keeping you all in my thoughts this weekend and Millie is crossing her paws extra hard.

    Cindy & Millie

    ReplyDelete
  29. Woof! Woof! Sending Lots of Golden LOVE. Crossing my Golden PAWS. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar

    ReplyDelete
  30. I'm so sorry this is in your life again. I hope the results show something minor and that you will be back romping your trails soon.

    ReplyDelete
  31. You know how much we understand the painfulness of this latest news. We are thinking of you.

    ReplyDelete
  32. This completely sucks. It is so not right that we want to scream back at fate with you. But, we will hang on to the hope that it can be taken care of, and wait with you until next week. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Oh I saw your post on the tripawds forum and was hoping the radiologist was going to come up with some different possibilities. We are keeping you in our thoughts, sending power of the paw for the best possible outcome of the 4 options.

    ReplyDelete
  34. OMG, we can't even see to type! This can't be! We are saying our prayers and crossing fingers and paws very very tightly here, KB.

    ReplyDelete
  35. My heart is aching for you all over again! I just can't imagine the sinking feeling you must have felt. I am sending all of our positive thoughts and prayers for Shyla. I will hold out hope that this is just a minor challenge for you both and you can happily back away from that darn cliff. Hang in there, we are all pulling for her!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Oh my gracious goodness. We are so sorry for this worry and are hoping for good news on Monday. Your doctor may be right. Special animals come to you.

    Sending many goat kisses your way.

    ReplyDelete
  37. You know you have good thoughts and support coming from Massachusetts. I know that no matter what the outcome, Shyla will have the best possible life. A dream life for a lab, full of big adventures in the mountains.

    Mango Momma

    ReplyDelete
  38. Oh noes.. We're keeping you in our thoughts this weekend!

    Ane & the WriggleButts

    ReplyDelete
  39. Dearest KB Fingers crossed for monday. Love EM

    ReplyDelete
  40. I know I can't comfort you, think no one can - but I will send you a hug and my best wishes.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Oh, my, I am so sorry to hear. This will be an unimaginably long weekend for you, but you have our strongest hopes and prayers that this either turns out to be nothing to worry about or something caught early enough to solve.

    Thinking of you.

    ReplyDelete
  42. I have tears here for you all. Try to enjoy your weekend. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. :)
    Marie

    ReplyDelete
  43. I am just sick with grief that you have to go through this, but I agree with what your vet said. If Shyla hadn't come to you, and IF she has a serious issue, would she have been with someone who could give her the same level of attention, love and care that you will? A friend who just lost a 20 year old cat was saying that she didn't want another animal because it's too hard to lose them - and you know you will, eventually. But I told her we can't penalize animals because their lives are shorter than ours. As you said, our animals are gifts; it's heartbreaking to lose them, but we just have to be strong, and love and care for them for the time - short or long - we have them. I always think of the scene in the original movie "Arthur" when he's talking about the death of his valet who was like a father to him. The person he's talking to says something about how it was too soon and hard to lose him, and Arthur responds "Hell, I was lucky just to know him." Wishing the best for Shyla with all my heart...

    ReplyDelete
  44. Oh KB, I am so sorry. We will keep paws crossed it doesn't happen again. Sending hugs and love and prayers your way.

    Sam

    ReplyDelete
  45. we are so sorry and have all our paws crossed for good results on Monday.....

    ReplyDelete
  46. This is all so wrong..........thoughts of your family as you face this challenge and prayers that it is all going to be fine (((KB)))

    ReplyDelete
  47. I am so, so sorry that this is popping up for you to deal with again. :( All my best wishes for a good outcome for Shyla, and great fortitude for you.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Waiting and not knowing are the hardest part -- the imagination can run riot. I can't even imagine how difficult this time is for you. But please know that there are many, many of us standing with you and sending out good wishes to the universe or whatever deity(s) we believe in for you and Shyla!

    ReplyDelete
  49. Will be keeping you and Shyla in my thoughts til there is more news. All the best to you both!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Dearest KB, I simply can't fathom you're going through this process again. My friend, I just wish there was something I could do for you this weekend-know you'll all be in my prayers. If my hubby wasn't flying out Monday morning, I'd be asking if I could join you at CSU vet school-just to be there but I trust the runner will be. Sending love and healing thoughts to you today.
    Noreen

    ReplyDelete
  51. I'm just at a loss for words and thinking the same thing as you are...not again! Somehow I feel there will be something really minor going on. I won't say try not to worry. I know you will worry. But you do have our prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  52. oH I hope you will be strong to this ...We will hope for the best that this will be something common...Hugs from us!

    ReplyDelete
  53. *´¨)
    ¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
    (¸.•´ (¸.•` ¤Prayers for strength, health and positive thoughts are coming to you from our corner in Virginia!!

    ReplyDelete
  54. What ever the diagnosis and whatever the outcome, Shyla is one very lucky girl to have you by her side. It's so easy to love them and so very hard to lose them...and then we go out and do it again, and again, and again. They fill our lives so fully, how could we not? My thoughts are with you and your whole family this weekend :)

    ReplyDelete
  55. Crap, not again! Thinkin' postitive thoughts and sendin' all of you our luvs and prayers.

    Woofs and Licks,
    Maggie Mae and Max

    ReplyDelete
  56. Oh my goodness we are sick. We will all think positively for a good outcome
    Benny & Lily

    ReplyDelete
  57. We all have come to love Shyla and we are in shock reading these words. Sending POSITIVE vibes...prayers...many, many prayers...and hugs.
    xo
    Jeanne, Chloe and LadyBug

    ReplyDelete
  58. I was speechless and in tears as I read this post. So I didn't comment until I went back and caught up. Now I've seen the sequence of events, and I wish so much that we could eliminate cancer altogether. Forever.

    ReplyDelete
  59. We are sitting beside you- hugging you,, and sending postive thoughts.
    We love you,
    love
    tweedles

    ReplyDelete

If you are a Blogger registered user, you can skip the step asking you to verify that you are not a spammer. For posts older than 5 days, I have comment moderation turned on.

Thanks for your comments!!!!!